Tumblr posts tagged #the grinch who stole christmas from across Tumblr — no login required.
You could say that, since Jesus turned over the tables at the Temple and set free all the doves that people would have sacrificed that weekend, that he was the Grinch That Stole Passover. Hence, the Christian celebration of Easter is a Grinchified holiday. So what does it mean when the Grinch Steals Christmas in the modern day? I’ll tell you what that means. It means that the Grinch is the Second Coming and, by Stealing Christmas, he ushers in the world that is to come.
Grinch x Martha May incorrect quotes bc I’m hyper fixated and adore them Martha: You have to apologize to them, Grinch Grinch: Fine! But I must warn you, this might make me a better, nicer person and that is NOT the grinch you fell in love with. Grinch: Do you want to explain the text you sent me last night? Martha: It was autocorrect. Grinch: Autocorrect wrote “You’re so hot. Please step on me.”? Martha: Yes. Grinch: Goodnight to the love of my life, Martha, and fuck the rest of y'all. Grinch: I fell— Martha : From heaven? Grinch: No, I literally fell— Martha : In love with me the moment you saw me? Grinch: MY ARM IS BROKEN! Martha : Okay, but do you think I’m pretty? Be honest. Grinch: Hey, random question, what are your favorite flowers? Martha : Peonies, why? Grinch: Martha : Were you going to get me flowers? Grinch: Martha: Grinch: ᶦᵗ’ˢ ᵃ ᵖᵒˢˢᶦᵇᶦˡᶦᵗʸ *Martha and Grinch skipping stones on lake* Martha: It’s such a beautiful evening. Grinch, whispering: Take that you fucking lake Martha: Do you take constructive criticism? Grinch: I only take cash or credit. Martha: Hey Grinch , I’ve got an idea for how to solve this. Grinch , pulling out a shotgun: Yeah? Martha: Wh- No! That’s not the idea, Grinch ! Martha, pointing: May I sit there? Grinch: That’s my lap Martha: That doesn’t answer my question, Grinch . *Grinch comes home absolutely drunk, undresses, and stands in Martha ’s bedroom.* Martha: Babe, are you.. coming to bed? Grinch: No thank you, I’m sure you’re lovely but I have a girlfriend. Grinch: *Lies on the ground and falls asleep* Martha: … Martha: I made this bracelet for you. Grinch: You know, I’m not really a jewelry person. Martha: You don’t have to wear… Grinch: No, I’m gonna wear it forever. Back off. Martha: Talk dirty to me~ Grinch: Inflation is a serious problem and lumber prices are at a high. Martha: Wha- Grinch: The economy is in shambles Grinch: Martha , why are you crying? Martha: This book is so sad!! Grinch, picking it up: But this is my diary- Grinch: Hey, wanna help me commit arson? Martha: What the hell!? Grinch: Oh, sorry, my bad. Grinch, whispering: Wanna help me commit arson? Martha, whispering: Of course. What do you need? Grinch: I don’t need to go to bed. I’m not tired, I’ll be fine. Martha: But, darling, I’ll be so lonely without you. Come curl up in my arms so I can feel whole again. Grinch: O-oh. Well. Are you trying to seduce me into healthy sleeping patterns?? Martha: Is it working? Martha: Are you ready to commit? Grinch: Like, a crime or a relationship? Martha: When I was young, I left a trail of broken hearts like a rockstar. I’m not proud of it. Grinch: You’re kind of proud of it. You work it into a lot of conversations. Grinch: I think I just figured something out. I got to go. Martha: Aren’t you forgetting something? Grinch: Uuh…*hesitantly kisses Martha ’s forehead before running out.* Martha: No, pay your bill! Damn, who raised you? Martha: We all have our demons. Martha, grabbing Grinch: This one’s mine. Grinch: You’re giving me a sticker? Martha: Not just a sticker. That is a sticker of a kitty saying “me-wow!” Grinch: I’m not a preschooler. Martha: Fine, I’ll take it back- Grinch: I earned this, back off! Grinch: Martha, do you love me? Martha: Of course I do. Grinch: Would you still love me if I did something bad? Martha: Well, of course I…. Would… Grinch: I mean something really… really bad. Martha: Grinch, what did you do?
I realize Christmas is over, BUT I need to share this with Tumblr. McDonalds in my country (Canada) has had a widely disliked and slightly odd Grinch branding all December. This is a result of those branding choices. My husband and I saw an ad for this that simply said “Who Hash” along with the price, and are now wondering: *do the Whos use Who-Hash? *What do the Whos put Who-Hash in? My husband also stated this implies there is Who-ijuana or Marij-Who-na and Who-Bongs.
I believe the Whos down in Whoville would find that their Grinch problems could be easily solved by setting reasonable noise limits so nobody feels the need to come down from the goddamn fucking mountain to try to get them to shut up. Do you know how far away that mountain is? How long of a walk? Do you think it’ll be just for a talk? Put a sock in it! Or nature will send her mister on over and out.
The Grinch, specifically from the animated television special not the new movies
Reminder, the premise is “would a normie think it’s weird to find them attractive?” (Would they have to “hear me out?”) NOT “smash-or-pass” Is the Grinch a “hear me out” or reasonably hot? HearMeOut: mean, green, stinky hater machine Hot: dog lover, fat ass, incredible strength, innovative, big heart, humanoid See Results
I very much relate to the grinch. Everything is too damn loud!
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