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One person cannot do it all. It is literally impossible. If you’re a single mom you’re not failing because you can’t do it all. Society failed you. You and your children deserve community. Capitalism and colonialism robbed us of what we all need to survive and thrive. You’re not a failure because you’re being mercilessly and endlessly sabotaged.
Co-parenting Diary #01 : is lonelier than i thought. Ternyata setelah semuanya selesai, yang paling sulit bukan menerima bahwa seseorang sudah tidak lagi tinggal di hidupmu. Tetapi menerima bahwa setelah cintanya pecah, hidup tetap berjalan. Anak tetap tumbuh. Hari tetap pagi. Sedangkan dua orang yang bahkan sudah tidak tahu cara saling memandang satu sama lain dengan utuh, tetap harus belajar jadi rumah untuk anak yang sama. Tidak pernah terbayangkan kalau menjadi Ibu suatu hari akan terasa seperti ini: penuh hitung-hitungan yang menyakitkan. Menghitung hari. Menghitung waktu untuk bertemu. Menghitung siapa lebih lama bersama dia minggu ini. Menghitung perubahan kecil yang mungkin bahkan tidak aku lihat lagi karena aku tidak ada di sana. Dan yang paling menyiksa adalah kenyataan bahwa rasa kehilangan ternyata bisa hadir tanpa benar-benar mengambil seseorang darimu. Karena anaknya masih ada. Masih memanggilku Ibu. Masih memelukku seperti biasa. Tapi ada bagian dari hidupnya yang pelan-pelan berjalan tanpa aku tahu. Dan aku takut mengatakannya dengan keras, karena terdengar egois, tapi memang seseram itu rasanya. Seseram menyadari bahwa suatu hari nanti mungkin aku tidak lagi tahu lagu apa yang sedang dia suka. Tidak tahu dia akhir-akhir ini susah makan atau tidak. Tidak tahu dia sekarang terbiasa tidur sambil mendengar cerita apa. Tidak tahu siapa yang dia cari pertama kali ketika bangun tidur. Padahal dulu aku ada di semua detail kecil itu. Dulu hidup terasa sederhana. Kami hanya bangun pagi, menjalani hari, lalu tidur lagi. Tidak pernah terpikir bahwa suatu hari nanti kebersamaan akan berubah jadi jadwal yang harus disepakati. Sekarang semuanya terasa seperti sedang belajar berjalan di atas kaca. Semua percakapan harus hati-hati. Semua keputusan terasa sangat sensitif. Semua kata bisa berubah jadi pertengkaran atau diam yang lebih panjang lagi. Dan lucunya, di tengah semua kekacauan ini, aku masih dituntut untuk tetap terdengar tenang. Padahal isi kepalaku berisik sekali. Ada hari-hari ketika rasanya ingin marah karena merasa ditinggalkan dari kehidupan anakku sendiri. Tapi di waktu yang sama, aku juga tahu di seberang sana ada seseorang yang sama kacaunya, sama takutnya, sama hancurnya. Akhirnya kami hanya jadi dua orang yang sama-sama lelah, mencoba terlihat kuat demi satu anak kecil yang bahkan belum benar-benar mengerti kenapa rumahnya sekarang terbagi dua. Mungkin memang begitu bentuk dewasa yang paling menyakitkan: ketika perasaan pribadi harus terus ditelan supaya anakmu tidak ikut tenggelam di dalamnya. Dan aku rasa orang-orang tidak pernah benar-benar membicarakan bagian ini : bahwa co-parenting bukan cuma soal bagi waktu, bukan cuma soal siapa lebih mampu, dan ukan cuma soal siapa yang lebih sering ada. Tapi tentang bagaimana cara tetap menjadi orang tua di tengah rasa kehilangan yang tidak pernah benar-benar selesai? Bagaimana cara menerima bahwa anakmu akan tetap tumbuh, bahkan di hari-hari ketika kamu merasa tertinggal dari hidupnya sendiri? Dan mungkin itu sebabnya akhir-akhir ini rasanya melelahkan. Ternyata menjaga hati sendiri tetap utuh sambil memastikan anakmu tetap merasa dicintai dari dua arah sekaligus… jauh lebih sulit dari yang pernah aku bayangkan. — dna | 11 Mei 2026
I don’t get to rewrite what I did. I don’t get to soften it, excuse it, or pretend it didn’t hurt people including myself. What I did was wrong, and that’s something I have to sit with. Not once, not occasionally, but honestly and fully. Accountability isn’t a moment for me it’s a practice. I also understand why people get uncomfortable when I talk about it. They should. Addiction isn’t clean or easy or inspiring in the way people like to package recovery stories. It’s raw. It’s ugly. It’s painful. It’s filled with choices I regret and moments I wish I could take back. So if it makes someone uneasy, that means they’re actually hearing it. It’s not supposed to feel good. But here’s what I’ve learned: addiction isn’t who I am it was the demon I was fighting. And I fought it. I lived it. I survived it. I’m still working through it every single day. I’m not ashamed to talk about it because silence is what keeps people stuck. If someone has questions, they can ask me. I’ve got nothing to hide I already lived through the worst parts. What’s not okay is when people take someone’s past and try to weaponize it. Posting about it, gossiping about it, reducing someone down to the lowest version of themselves that says more about them than it ever will about me. People who do that don’t understand addiction, and honestly, they don’t sound informed they sound small. Everyone’s addiction is different. Every story is different. And every recovery is hard-earned in ways most people will never fully understand. Do I feel shame? Yeah, I do. I won’t lie about that. But I also feel something stronger than shame now I feel pride. Real pride. The kind that comes from clawing your way out of something that was trying to destroy you. The kind that comes from changing, growing, and refusing to stay the person you used to be. I hit eleven years in February. Eleven years of choosing something different. Eleven years of facing myself instead of running. That version of me didn’t just appear I worked for her. I fought for her. I became her. I get to brag about her. So if people want to talk about addiction, they should at least understand it. Learn something. Respect the fact that no two people go through it the same way. Because from where I’m standing, the only thing more embarrassing than having a past like mine… is judging someone for surviving theirs. And if my story makes you uncomfortable? Good. That means it’s real.
Is Aiden America’s Favorite Student? Help Aiden get into the top 5 to advance to t he next round. He is at #7 now. Vote and share the link! Voting for the TOP 5 ends Today @ 7PM PDT! https://americasfavstudent.org/2026/aiden-108 Is Aiden America’s Favorite Student?
LIMITED-TIME: 2X VOTES Help Aiden get into the top 5 to advance to the next round. He is at #7 now. Vote and share the link! Voting for the TOP 5 ends tomorrow, 4/16 @ 7PM PDT! Is Aiden America’s Favorite Student?
Malugod na pagbati! Kami ay mga 3rd-year Psychology students mula sa National University - Fairview na nagsasagawa ng isang kwalitibong pag-aaral. Layunin nitong tuklasin ang mga karanasan ng mga single mothers na umalis sa mapang-abusong relasyon at kasalukuyang pinamamahalaan ang parehong responsibilidad sa pag-aalaga sa anak at pagtatrabaho. Kami ay naghahanap na mga kalahok na pasok sa mga sumusunod na kraytirya: • Isang single mother na nakaranas ng karahasan mula sa karelasyon (pisikal, berbal, at/o pinansyal na pang-aabuso); • May edad 35-45 taong gulang; • Dating full-time na tagapangasiwa at nakatuon sa mga gawaing bahay at pag-aalaga ng/mga anak. • Matagal nang hiwalay sa dating karelasyon na mapang-abuso (maaaring legal o hindi pormal) na hindi bababa sa dalawang (2) taon • Sa kasalukuyan ay pangunahing naghahanapbuhay at nag-aalaga sa mga anak na nasa edad 7-12; at • Kasalukuyang nagtatrabaho Magkakaroon ng kasamang licensed psychologist sa buong panayam upang magbigay ng gabay at masiguro ang emosyonal na kaligtasan ng mga kalahok. Lahat ng impormasyong nakalap ay ituturing na may mahigpit na kumpidensyalidad at gagamitin lamang para sa mga layuning pang-akademiko. Ang paglahok sa pag-aaral na ito ay ganap na boluntaryo at maaaring umatras ang mga kalahok anumang oras. Sa pagkilala sa kanilang oras, pagsisikap, at kontribusyon sa pag-aaral, ang mga kalahok ay makakatanggap ng kompensasyon. Ang mga kompensasyong ito ay inaalok upang kilalanin ang mga kontribusyon at hindi nilalayong pilitin o impluwensyahan ang pakikilahok. Kung ikaw ay interestado at pasok sa kraytirya, maaari mong sagutan ang form na ito: https://forms.gle/n43E6Uw7epaA6Yuj8 Maaari mo ring i-scan ang QR code sa ibaba upang mabilis at madaling mapunan ang form. Para sa mga katanungan o paglilinaw, maaari mo kaming kontakin sa: 📩 gumirank2005@gmail.com 📩 darleneabrenica825@gmail.com 📩 jalaniaabduljalil1@gmail.com 📩 franzbalderama@gmail.com Salamat sa iyong oras at kagustuhang makapag-ambag sa aming pananaliksik. Salamat sa pagpili na sumali sa aming pag-aaral. Ang iyong oras, pananaw, at pagsisikap na ibahagi ang iyong kwento ay aming lubos na pinahahalagahan. Ito ay magbibigay-daan sa pag-unawa at pagsuporta sa mga single mothers na dumaan sa katulad na mga sitwasyon. https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1FA90_d8pep8llbKCqJ5xWivf9eFfpKljTdL0qOeSTVo/viewform
The heart of a single mom watching her son grow up. I thought the scary parts of motherhood was the newborn to toddler stage. I’ve come to learn that it only gets scarier. Raising a son as a mom who is doing 99% of the work is a job I don’t wish on other parents. Parenting in a “perfect” home already has its challenges– single parent parenting is a whole other ball park. Thank God for the blood of Jesus that washes away the condemnation sin brings, however, the consequences remain- and this is mine. I’m not saying that my child is a burden. I love my child beyond measures and his birth awakened a love in me I didn’t even know existed. What I am saying is, single parenting has taught me the value of God’s order; the protection it brings, not just for your marriage but your family, and the blessings that overflow. What a blessing it is to unite as one with your husband/wife and boldly live out your God given role out in your home- in a world that opposes it. I’m a woman- a mom, that can only operate under the Godly woman wisdom God bestows upon me. I was not created to be a father, and because of this there are areas I feel I lack in as a mother raising a son and it saddens me. It saddens me because these are the consequences my child now has to experience because of my disobedience to Gods order. You’ve ever come across a video of a man building something and catch a comment under the post that says “can you make a tutorial for how you did this- I grew up without my dad teaching me these things”… like, how gut wrenching is that? I want my child to experience what it is to have a present father figure in the home. Thank God for the hope found in Jesus. While I feel these things I can hold on to the promises of God that says he makes ALL things new, here on earth and in heaven. (2 Corinthians 5:17; Isaiah 43:19, Revelations 21:5). While I wrestle with the thoughts of the cross I have to carry daily, I am reminded of the cross at Calvary- where Jesus said “it is finished”, my debt was paid in full. I have hope in the midst of my sadness because God knows the prayers I’ve prayed in secret and the pain I quietly carry as I wait on his perfect timing. For the husband I desire; A spiritual leader in the faith, a man full of patience (mostly bc of me >.<), and who would love Zander as his own. I don’t want Z to be the guy under a post on the internet telling a stranger to teach him how to drill wood pieces together because he didn’t have his dad around. I know the most important thing I can do for my son is to reflect the love of Christ to him, intercede for him in prayer, and spend all my days pointing him to Jesus- it’s the only thing I can do while God, in his sovereignty, takes care of the rest.
Things I wish I was told.. There’s something about being a teenager that makes everything feel permanent. Every mistake feels like it will follow you forever. Every heartbreak feels like the end of the story, not just a chapter. Even the smallest moments something you said wrong, something you wore, the way someone looked at you can feel like they define who you are. But they don’t. If we could go back and sit beside our younger selves, we wouldn’t hand them all the answers. We’d just tell them this: you’re allowed to not know yet. You’re allowed to change. You’re allowed to become someone completely different from who you thought you’d be. What feels overwhelming right now won’t always feel this heavy. What feels like failure is often just growth happening in real time. The people you think you can’t live without, the paths you think you have to follow those things can shift, and that doesn’t mean you’ve lost something. It means you’re finding something else. There’s no timeline you’re supposed to be on. You’re not late. You’re not behind. You’re not missing it. You’re just becoming. And that process messy, uncertain, uncomfortable is not something to fix. It’s something to live through. It’s okay to be exactly where you are.
Hey everyone, I normally don’t ask for help like this, but I recently started a GoFundMe to help with my financial support during a difficult time. Things have been really difficult lately, and any support — even just sharing this — would mean a lot to me. If you’d like to help, here’s the link: https://gofund.me/4ec213897 Thank you for reading and supporting me ❤️ Donate to Help Jhona Stay Safe and Secure, organized by Jhona Serrano
after being brought up in a nobody is going to fix things and nobody is going to save you world, why the HELL do you think im gonna ask for shit. for another “I told you so”? The lesson(s) are being learned in real time…no need for the unwanted input. Until there’s an automated payment coming to my account for simply “being a good person” just leave me alone.
“Why won’t you just give up already?” The infamous question my daughter asked me this past weekend while I try my best to keep our worlds together while I navigate this mess we’re dealing with. I look back now and think am I down so bad right now that it’s apparent I’m at my wits end? Or am I showing her how resilient her mother is even though things are so difficult for me to bare? Raising my daughter has changed drastically to the point it has ruined my vision of ever considering expanding my family again. It’s made me feel like maybe I’m not capable of doing this mom thing. A thought I sadly hate even saying out loud. My baby is no longer a baby, she’s now a over exposed pre-teen with thoughts and opinions bigger than she can even understand. When I react she tells me “ I’m making something out of something ”… exactly that line alone tells you her brain can’t even compute their own thoughts correctly and she’s just throwing out phases she thinks she understands. I cried time over time again to her father about what I’m facing with our child but he does nothing about it. He makes it seems like I’m the crazy one or I’m overreacting. When I know I’m not. I feel so alone in this parenting situation and working with him has made it so difficult to put any type of boundaries with our child. I fought so hard to make sure her dad was in her life but sometimes I think it was my biggest mistake. I’m starting to have thoughts like why did I do this to myself? then I remember who I was before my daughter and how she changed my life. If it wasn’t for her, I prob would’ve never pursued entrepreneurship or achieved half the things I’ve done thus far between the ages of 26-32. I also think about this generational curse that affects mom/daughter relationships in my family. It has hit 3 generations so far and it pains to me to see our relationship start to unfold the same way. When I think about my life and what I want, I see lavish, luxury, ease but it seems harder to achieve when I’m constantly worried about my child. But I know it’s possible. It’s possible for me to show my daughter she’s worthy of so much more and she shouldn’t tolerate or look for love outside herself especially at the tender age of 11. So to answer your question my love I will never give up on you. I would rather die trying than give up on you. Yes momm'in you right now feels like the most difficult part of my life at the moment but I know this too shall pass and all this fire you possess as an Aries child will protect you and make you into a very fierce woman. It’s my responsibility as your mom to protect you from your own flame and teach you how to use it to pave through your obstacles. My plan, therapy, therapy, therapy. We might even throw in there some some confidence building classes, look for mentorships for you. Really apply and reconnect you to you again. I really do apologize for my faults in raising you but I’m literally figuring this out along the way. All I can do is try to repair what was broken. Until next time my love. BG
just realized that every version of me i’ve ever been is still somewhere inside me. like. middle school me who thought eyeliner fixed everything. the version of me who stayed up at 3am overthinking texts. the one who finally stopped chasing people who wouldn’t choose me. they didn’t disappear. they just… layered. and somehow i’m still becoming someone new on top of all of that. and now i’m apparently also supposed to be the one who explains life to tiny humans??? like i barely understand taxes or why i cried over a vine in 2014 but sure let me just break down existence, emotions, and the concept of “everything is temporary” in between making snacks and finding missing socks anyway i think that’s kind of beautiful and kind of terrifying and i don’t know what to do with that information. #tumblr #chaotic mom energy #parenting #late night thoughts #existentialism #growing up #mom life #identity crisis #life thoughts #overthinking #healing #introspection #being an adult is fake #send help
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